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Author Topic: Personal assistant  (Read 9525 times)

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Offline Ender

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Personal assistant
« on: March 17, 2008, 03:12:12 am »
I need a personal assistant. To apply for this job, I require a cover letter and resume. I prefer that you post them here, but if you desire you can PM them to me instead. Advice and examples are provided below.

A word on the Application:

Do not give any detailed personal information (e.g. names, locations, email addresses that have your name in it, etc.)

Example Cover Letter:

March 17, 2008
Forum Alias Here
public_email_address_here@gmail.com

Dear Ender,

Par. 1: Write that you would like to be my PA. Say a little about yourself here.

Par. 2: Say why you would be an ideal candidate, and why I would want to choose you from all the applicants.

Par. 3: Compliment me here.

Sincerely,
Forum Alias Here

Example Resume:

Interests here.

Hobbies here.

Music taste here.

Origins of music taste here.

Philosophy on the Nymphicus hollandicus species here.

Additional information here.

A Word on the Examples:

I would prefer that you do not strictly follow my examples. I would like to see you customize it and add your own creative touch.

Write well, and good luck!
--Ender
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Offline Newby

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Re: Personal assistant
« Reply #1 on: March 17, 2008, 06:21:44 pm »
What will they be assisting you with?
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Quote
[17:32:45] * xar sets mode: -oooooooooo algorithm ban chris cipher newby stdio TehUser tnarongi|away vursed warz
[17:32:54] * xar sets mode: +o newby
[17:32:58] <xar> new rule
[17:33:02] <xar> me and newby rule all

Quote from: Rule on June 30, 2008, 01:13:20 pm
Quote from: CrAz3D on June 30, 2008, 10:38:22 am
I'd bet that you're currently bloated like a water ballon on a hot summer's day.

That analogy doesn't even make sense.  Why would a water balloon be especially bloated on a hot summer's day? For your sake, I hope there wasn't too much logic testing on your LSAT. 

Offline Ender

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Re: Personal assistant
« Reply #2 on: March 17, 2008, 06:52:44 pm »
iono.
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Offline Ender

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Re: Personal assistant
« Reply #3 on: March 17, 2008, 10:53:30 pm »
I have received an overwhelming number of applications through email, but it seems like people are a little shy in this thread.
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Offline Sidoh

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Re: Personal assistant
« Reply #4 on: March 17, 2008, 10:54:21 pm »
Quote from: Ender on March 17, 2008, 10:53:30 pm
I have received an overwhelming number of applications through email, but it seems like people are a little shy in this thread.

Please quantify overwhelming. :)
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trust

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Re: Personal assistant
« Reply #5 on: March 17, 2008, 10:55:41 pm »
why would someone want to be your bitch?
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Offline Warrior

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Re: Personal assistant
« Reply #6 on: March 17, 2008, 11:19:32 pm »
Quote from: Trust on March 17, 2008, 10:55:41 pm
why would someone want to be your bitch?

have you seen his hands? they're gorgeous
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Offline Ender

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Re: Personal assistant
« Reply #7 on: March 17, 2008, 11:25:11 pm »
Quote from: Sidoh on March 17, 2008, 10:54:21 pm
Quote from: Ender on March 17, 2008, 10:53:30 pm
I have received an overwhelming number of applications through email, but it seems like people are a little shy in this thread.

Please quantify overwhelming. :)

Enough to feed 5,000.

Quote from: Trust on March 17, 2008, 10:55:41 pm
why would someone want to be your bitch?

Because you, of all people, are in dire need of redemption.
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Offline Joe

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Re: Personal assistant
« Reply #8 on: March 18, 2008, 02:57:41 am »
Cover Letter:

March 18, 2008
Joe
joetheodd@gmail.com

Dear Ender,

Par. 1: I would like to be your PA.

Par. 2: I am an ideal candidate.

Par. 3: You smell good.

Sincerely,
Joe

Resume:

I am interested in personally assisting.

My hobbies include assisting in personal matters, on a personal level.

Loud is good.

Newby says loud is good.

Wut iz a Nymphicus hollandicus?

I learned addition in second grade.
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Quote from: Camel on June 09, 2009, 04:12:23 pm
I'd personally do as Joe suggests

Quote from: AntiVirus on October 19, 2010, 02:36:52 pm
You might be right about that, Joe.

Offline Ender

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Re: Personal assistant
« Reply #9 on: March 18, 2008, 07:06:39 am »
Congratulations, Joe, you're now my bitch.
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Offline Newby

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Re: Personal assistant
« Reply #10 on: March 18, 2008, 12:24:27 pm »
I have changed his title accordingly.
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Quote
[17:32:45] * xar sets mode: -oooooooooo algorithm ban chris cipher newby stdio TehUser tnarongi|away vursed warz
[17:32:54] * xar sets mode: +o newby
[17:32:58] <xar> new rule
[17:33:02] <xar> me and newby rule all

Quote from: Rule on June 30, 2008, 01:13:20 pm
Quote from: CrAz3D on June 30, 2008, 10:38:22 am
I'd bet that you're currently bloated like a water ballon on a hot summer's day.

That analogy doesn't even make sense.  Why would a water balloon be especially bloated on a hot summer's day? For your sake, I hope there wasn't too much logic testing on your LSAT. 

trust

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Re: Personal assistant
« Reply #11 on: March 18, 2008, 12:28:17 pm »
Joe is disqualified because he gave out his real name.
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Offline Ender

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Re: Personal assistant
« Reply #12 on: March 18, 2008, 05:30:20 pm »
Quote from: Newby on March 18, 2008, 12:24:27 pm
I have changed his title accordingly.

:D :D :D :D :D
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Offline Blaze

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Re: Personal assistant
« Reply #13 on: March 18, 2008, 08:11:09 pm »
Quote from: Trust on March 18, 2008, 12:28:17 pm
Joe is disqualified because he gave out his real name.

Totally not his real name.  :P
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Offline CrAz3D

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Re: Personal assistant
« Reply #14 on: March 18, 2008, 09:01:41 pm »
Fuck bein a personal assistant, I'm an administrative assistant BITCH!  (I'm a secretary come May :()
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Offline Explicit

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Re: Personal assistant
« Reply #15 on: March 19, 2008, 12:26:02 am »
You're still someone's bitch. :(
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Offline CrAz3D

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Re: Personal assistant
« Reply #16 on: March 19, 2008, 12:27:32 am »
I know, but at least I get paid decently well
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Offline iago

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Re: Personal assistant
« Reply #17 on: March 19, 2008, 08:35:55 am »
Is Joe fired after the cow incident?
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Offline Ender

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Re: Personal assistant
« Reply #18 on: March 19, 2008, 01:42:20 pm »
No, he's too valuable. But he did get a paycut.
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Offline Ender

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Re: Personal assistant
« Reply #19 on: March 20, 2008, 11:29:20 am »
You fail in many ways, but not in that one. You're still my PA.

Oh, and did I mention this was a lifetime-binding contract?
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Offline CrAz3D

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Re: Personal assistant
« Reply #20 on: March 20, 2008, 09:34:18 pm »
Quote from: iago on March 19, 2008, 08:35:55 am
Is Joe fired after the cow incident?


Cow?  Did he make some joke about deadly & (forehead-dot) indians?
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Offline Blaze

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Re: Personal assistant
« Reply #21 on: March 20, 2008, 10:42:17 pm »
Quote from: CrAz3D on March 20, 2008, 09:34:18 pm
Quote from: iago on March 19, 2008, 08:35:55 am
Is Joe fired after the cow incident?


Cow?  Did he make some joke about deadly & (forehead-dot) indians?

http://www.x86labs.org/forum/index.php/topic,11621.0.html
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Offline Ender

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Re: Personal assistant
« Reply #22 on: March 20, 2008, 11:12:21 pm »
Quote from: CrAz3D on March 20, 2008, 09:34:18 pm
Quote from: iago on March 19, 2008, 08:35:55 am
Is Joe fired after the cow incident?


Cow?  Did he make some joke about deadly & (forehead-dot) indians?

Do you mean "forehead-dotted?" "Forehead-dot" is a noun.

Just trying to edify where I can.
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