I posted this on another board I frequent, but since some of you know me and have seen me go through some interesting stages, I feel I should also share this here...
I've always suffered from depression and anxiety, both severe and I could never figure out what was quite wrong... it's been years that I haven't been able to "find myself" and always felt out of place. Struggled in school, unhealthy relationships, drugs, criminal activities.. none of it felt like "me," but it all distracted me from my internal struggle. I've lifted on and off for years, never getting any significant results other then a good amount of weight loss. This brings me to December 2010, I had a routine surgery to fix a broken nose that I had neglected for a while.. during the pre-op blood testing I asked the doctor to check my testosterone levels, simply because I lift and was curious.
At first they refused, claiming the only reason someone at my age would care is because of steroid use.. eventually the doctor OK'ed it and they ran the test. My testosterone levels came back ridiculously low, in fact my doctor compared it to the levels he would see in a 70+yr old male. He sent me off to an endocrinologist, who claimed it didn't really make any sense and even from the very first appointment with him he said there may even possibly be a tumor causing this. I went through many blood tests, multiple MRIs, and a procedure to draw blood directly from the brain.
Six months later, and I have been diagnosed with Cushing's Disease caused by a tumor in the pituitary gland on my brain. On June 23rd I will be going in for brain surgery, endoscopic skull base pituitary surgery to be exact in the hopes that my surgeon can remove the entire tumor and cure the disease, and allow me to live a normal and successful life. I don't know if I'm writing this more to get my story out, or to advise everyone to always investigate a problem with your health if you truly feel there is one. It's not always just "be a man, get over it, disregard everything, acquire currency.." sometimes there is an actual cause for your thoughts and problems. After years of struggling with severe anxiety and depression, I've finally found the cause and am taking the steps to turn my life around. Don't lose hope misc, don't ever lose hope.
tl;dr I suggest you read it, but basically I struggled all my life, eventually discovered a brain tumor causing my problems, am getting brain surgery on June 23rd to remove the tumor and I have a positive outlook on the rest of my life. I've been through hell and back, and now it's all coming to an end because I took the choice to consult many different doctors and find out what was wrong with me.
