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Microsoft's evil secret

Started by iago, July 17, 2006, 03:01:26 PM

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iago

July 17, 2006, 03:01:26 PM
Recently one of my friends, a computer wizard, paid me a visit. As we were talking I mentioned having recently installed Windows 98 on my PC and that I am very happy with this operating system. I also showed him the Windows 98 CD, and to my surprise he threw it into my micro-wave oven and turned on the oven. Instantly I got very upset, because the CD had become precious to me, but he said: 'Do not worry, it is unharmed.'

After a few minutes he took the CD out, gave it to me and said: 'Take a close look at it.' To my surprise the CD was quite cold to hold and it seemed to be heavier than before. At first I could not see anything, but then on the inner edge of the central hole I saw an inscription; an inscription finer than anything I have ever seen before. The inscription shone piercingly bright, and yet remote, as if out of a great depth:

4F6E65204F5320746F2072756C65207468656D20616C6C2C204F6E65204F5320746 F2066696E64207468656D2CDA4F6E65204F5320746F206272696E67207468656D20 616C6C20616E6420696E20746865206461726B6E6573732062696E64207468656D

'I cannot understand the fiery letters,' I said.

'No,' he said 'but I can. The letters are Hex, of an ancient mode, but the language is that of Microsoft, which I shall not utter here.

-------------------

.... and I won't post the translation here.  If you are quick, you won't even need to translate the hex to know what it says :)

rabbit

#1
July 17, 2006, 03:08:20 PM
Thief!

I'm wondering if this is real?

iago

#2
July 17, 2006, 03:09:49 PM
Unless some cd-maker has an awesome sense of satirical humor, I doubt it.

Sidoh

#3
July 17, 2006, 03:33:44 PM
ROFL!!!

Hahaha, that's great.

Chavo

#4
July 17, 2006, 03:41:57 PM
groan, kinda funny but mostly corny as hell

Warrior

#5
July 17, 2006, 05:03:27 PM
Shouldn't this go in RoflCopter or offtopic..I don't see how this is news..
One must ask oneself: "do I will trolling to become a universal law?" And then when one realizes "yes, I do will it to be such," one feels completely justified.
-- from Groundwork for the Metaphysics of Trolling

iago

#6
July 17, 2006, 05:27:33 PM Last Edit: July 17, 2006, 05:40:23 PM by iago
Quote from: Warriorx86] link=topic=6721.msg82179#msg82179 date=1153170207]
Shouldn't this go in RoflCopter or offtopic..I don't see how this is news..
That's why it's not in the NEWS forum. 

Parody** like this only works when it's unexpected, and that's why it's here. 

CrAz3D

#7
July 17, 2006, 05:31:15 PM Last Edit: July 17, 2006, 06:10:29 PM by CrAz3D
hahaha!  I'm pretty sure I've seen this before, still funny though

I think satire works expected or not...
(I agree w/Wwarrior & Myndfyre about this belonging in the ROFL forum)

Editted to make the change for parody
Quote from: iago on July 17, 2006, 05:27:33 PM
Quote from: Warriorx86] link=topic=6721.msg82179#msg82179 date=1153170207]
Shouldn't this go in RoflCopter or offtopic..I don't see how this is news..
That's why it's not in the NEWS forum. 

Parody** like this only works when it's unexpected, and that's why it's here. 

Weird Al sings parodies, those are VERY expected & quite funny (sometimes)

Technically, isnt it an illusion?... (I'm almost just guessing, I havent worked with english stuff like this in...4 years)

iago

#8
July 17, 2006, 06:50:50 PM
The distinction between parody and allusion is pretty blurred, at least in my mind.  But you might be right that it's more of an allusion. 

Anyway, I was at work before, so I'll post a little more explanation of why I put this in General. 

When I read it today, I didn't know what it was about.  He put the CD in the microwave, and I was thinking he actually did that. Then it said "don't worry, it's unharmed", and I was thinking wait, haven't I read this before?  It sounded most familiar.  But I read on.  Then it said that he handed it to the narrator, and it was "cold to hold and ..... heavier than before".  That's when it struck me what the actual reference was!  And the rest just confirmed what I'd already figured out. 

Thus, the majority of the enjoyability in it was, to me, the discovery not only that this was a joke, but that it was almost a direct passage from Lord of the Rings.  And the entire reason that I enjoyed it was because I didn't know it was supposed to be funny. 

And so, with proper classification, an avenue of enjoyment that LotR fans get is blocked.  So I put it here, in the hopes that others could enjoy it the same way as me. 

d&q

#10
July 17, 2006, 08:16:35 PM
Quotebut the language is that of Microsoft, which I shall not utter here.

That was the part that gave it away  :P.
The writ of the founders must endure.

Sidoh

#11
July 17, 2006, 08:22:52 PM

CrAz3D

#12
July 17, 2006, 08:24:54 PM
yeah,k.
the little saying itself is an allusion, what made me wonder was mentioned in the story

Blaze

#13
July 18, 2006, 12:43:09 AM
That IS awesome!  :)
And like a fool I believed myself, and thought I was somebody else...
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