Author Topic: 0wnz0red  (Read 3429 times)

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Offline Hdx

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0wnz0red
« on: September 25, 2009, 02:24:26 PM »
Has anybody read this?
My roommate just gave it to me (put it on my desktop with a big fucking READ THIS note)
Its rather interesting, you can read it here.
If only this shit existed today. (I have no doubt it will at sometime in the future.)
http://img140.exs.cx/img140/6720/hdxnew6lb.gif
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Offline Joe

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Re: 0wnz0red
« Reply #1 on: September 26, 2009, 09:30:20 PM »
That was a pretty good read.
I'd personally do as Joe suggests

You might be right about that, Joe.


Offline Lead

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Re: 0wnz0red
« Reply #2 on: September 26, 2009, 10:20:23 PM »
Can someone give me the tl;dr version?


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Offline Hdx

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Re: 0wnz0red
« Reply #3 on: September 26, 2009, 10:26:30 PM »
No, quit being lazy.
http://img140.exs.cx/img140/6720/hdxnew6lb.gif
09/08/05 - Clan SBs @ USEast
 [19:59:04.000] <DeadHelp> We don't like customers.
 [19:59:05.922] <DeadHelp> They're assholes
 [19:59:08.094] <DeadHelp> And they're never right.

Offline Blaze

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Re: 0wnz0red
« Reply #4 on: September 26, 2009, 10:26:38 PM »
Can someone give me the tl;dr version?

His friend gets turned into a computer by the government, and secretly hacks himself to be awesome, then escapes.  He changes his friend (the person telling the story) into the same, they both get captured by the government.  He refuses to do anything for them, so they let them go and pay them to keep quiet.  He moves to Africa.  The End.
And like a fool I believed myself, and thought I was somebody else...

Offline rabbit

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Re: 0wnz0red
« Reply #5 on: September 26, 2009, 10:36:44 PM »
Such a good read.  tl;dr does no justice.

Offline Blaze

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Re: 0wnz0red
« Reply #6 on: September 26, 2009, 10:46:09 PM »
Hey, I could do justice, just not in a tl;dr.
And like a fool I believed myself, and thought I was somebody else...

Offline Joe

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Re: 0wnz0red
« Reply #7 on: September 27, 2009, 06:59:38 PM »
The story starts with a man at his computer programming job, in a deep depression a few months after his best friend died of AIDS. He eventually goes to see a psychologist and takes leave, then takes a "horizontal promotion" to a documentation-writing position. He walks out of work one night, and there's his friend Liam, apparently "undead of AIDS".

The guy, who's name I forgot, assumes he's hallucinating but goes along with it. Liam, totally in shape (and not dying of AIDS), tells him the story about his adventure to the hospital. The government designed a virus (medical) and injected it into Liam. It had a 1% chance of surviving a proper immune system, but since Liam was dying of AIDS, it took off. The virus, in some sci-fi way, read "code" from a microchip on his neck and executed that code in his body. Rebuild his muscles, accelerate his metabolism and immune system. Kill his AIDS,  etc, etc. He stole the SDK and booked it out of the hospital, and continued to write algorithms to make him pretty much the strongest man on the planet.

Meanwhile, he passes his cigarette to the main character after "accidentally" wetting the filter, and "infects" him with the virus. He gives his friend a copy of the SDK, and they go to Fry's Electronics to build a new chip for him.

Skip forward, the FBI has both of them. Insert cryptography plug about how 4096-byte encryption cannot be broken, and then they're sent to Africa to shut up.

EDIT -
The cryptography plug was that their houses were both searched and all that they found were a few CD's, all encrypted with pass-poems.
« Last Edit: September 27, 2009, 10:04:11 PM by Joe »
I'd personally do as Joe suggests

You might be right about that, Joe.


Offline Joe

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Re: 0wnz0red
« Reply #8 on: September 27, 2009, 10:02:14 PM »
Blaze's version is accurate, but sucks.

Sorry Blaze!
I'd personally do as Joe suggests

You might be right about that, Joe.


Offline iago

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Re: 0wnz0red
« Reply #9 on: September 27, 2009, 10:24:12 PM »
I made it about half way through. It's pretty good. I'll finish it soon, I hope.

This should be the first 'Book' for Ender's 'Book club'.. start off easy. :)

Offline Quik

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Re: 0wnz0red
« Reply #10 on: September 27, 2009, 11:57:44 PM »
Hahaha.. you all have too much time on your hands for reading this.

Can someone give me the tl;dr version?

His friend gets turned into a computer by the government, and secretly hacks himself to be awesome, then escapes.  He changes his friend (the person telling the story) into the same, they both get captured by the government.  He refuses to do anything for them, so they let them go and pay them to keep quiet.  He moves to Africa.  The End.

This confused me, and I probably spent more time trying to decode what it said and comprehend it then it would have taken me to read the original story. Thanks jerk. ;]
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Offline iago

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Re: 0wnz0red
« Reply #11 on: September 28, 2009, 10:51:05 AM »
SPOILERS!!! (like most of this thread :) )

Good story, but I don't like the ending much. Liam doesn't seem to be the type to sell out like that, it doesn't suit his character. And I'm also surprised that the government would just let him go like that. I was expecting a 1984-esque ending, but I was disappointed. :-/

I think everything after Murray started writing his own code was sort of disappointing and it seemed rushed.

Offline Tuberload

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Re: 0wnz0red
« Reply #12 on: September 28, 2009, 08:00:44 PM »
SPOILERS!!! (like most of this thread :) )

Good story, but I don't like the ending much. Liam doesn't seem to be the type to sell out like that, it doesn't suit his character. And I'm also surprised that the government would just let him go like that. I was expecting a 1984-esque ending, but I was disappointed. :-/

I think everything after Murray started writing his own code was sort of disappointing and it seemed rushed.


I agree. I was enjoying the story till about that time, and then it just seemed hurried along.
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Offline iago

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Re: 0wnz0red
« Reply #13 on: September 28, 2009, 09:53:41 PM »
SPOILERS!!! (like most of this thread :) )

Good story, but I don't like the ending much. Liam doesn't seem to be the type to sell out like that, it doesn't suit his character. And I'm also surprised that the government would just let him go like that. I was expecting a 1984-esque ending, but I was disappointed. :-/

I think everything after Murray started writing his own code was sort of disappointing and it seemed rushed.


I agree. I was enjoying the story till about that time, and then it just seemed hurried along.

I keep thinking about it and wondering how it ended. Then I remember that I read it to the end, but that the end wasn't that good.

Ohwell, life goes on.

We should have a contest: who can write the best alternate ending, starting at the point where Murray is developing the software for his own brain (or maybe even when Liam is getting the gear from Fry's (or even after they were both captured, and you find out that Liam's cooperation was [a ruse/programmed into him])).

Offline Joe

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Re: 0wnz0red
« Reply #14 on: April 14, 2019, 10:16:41 PM »
Y'know, I've been thinking about this story every once in a while for the past 10 years, and I tried Googling "story about guy who hacked himself" but that obviously didn't turn it up. Here it is, still posted on Salon: https://www.salon.com/2002/08/28/0wnz0red/
I'd personally do as Joe suggests

You might be right about that, Joe.


Offline Blaze

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Re: 0wnz0red
« Reply #15 on: June 03, 2019, 11:11:58 PM »
I bet I could write a better summary these days.. guess we'll never know; I can't remember how the story goes.
And like a fool I believed myself, and thought I was somebody else...