Never thought I'd say this...

[Screenor]

Never thought I'd say this, but fuck you Mr. President Bush.

http://www.whitehouse.org/initiatives/purity/advice.asp

Also, if you can't veiw that link anymore:

http://screend-productions.net/dumbadvice.htm (Note: It has no pictures because I'm not about to upload all the crap onto my FTP).

Comment.

[Joe]

Words can't express how stupid that is.

[Vex3]

Throw away your television. There is absolutely nothing of value on television. Everyone should be reading their Bibles or working, not watching filth like Baywatch or Star Trek.

I definatly liked this one. Could some one tell me how Star Trek is filth? The hottest girl on there is like some mutated freak that I wouldn't exactly consider a "turn-on". Second of all Baywatch might be a "turn-on" but if your going to wack or jill off, you might want to consider the fact that most people do it to a thing called porn where there are naked men/women. However in baywatch they just have sexy popping out of the water scenes.

But I think that this one just blew my mind away(not in the way George is thinking).

[Joe]

Its times like this Tyler and Ron like being Canadians =p

EDIT -
Also, wtf is rap-hop? Bush == Dumb;

Click just for kids. Rocking Out! Betcha didn't know that President Bush is so cool, He even has His own iPod! It's true! Just check out His über-patriotic playlist!

[Screenor]

x86] link=topic=2408.msg22544#msg22544 date=1124634044]
Its times like this Tyler and Ron like being Canadians =p

EDIT -
Also, wtf is rap-hop? Bush == Dumb;

Click just for kids. Rocking Out! Betcha didn't know that President Bush is so cool, He even has His own iPod! It's true! Just check out His über-patriotic playlist!

Rofl.

[Ergot]

You guys do know that's like a parody site right?

[Krazed]

You guys do know that's like a parody site right?

I don't think they do. That's why I moved it.

[Blaze]

# ACNE: Does your teenager have acne? Masturbation often leads to excessive hormone production, which is the primary cause of acne. Very few teenagers who don't masturbate have acne.
----------
Eating Greasy food

# DEPRESSION: Is your teenager depressed? If a teenager acts sullen, withdrawn or unhappy – the most likely cause is chronic masturbation.
----------
Doing bad in school

# DESIRE FOR PRIVACY: Does your child lock his or her bedroom door? It is not healthy for a teen to desire privacy. Chances are he or she is in there masturbating.
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Wtf?

# "ROCK" MUSIC: Does your child listen to "Rock And Roll" music? If a teenager has rebelled against God far enough to listen to the Devil's music, then he or she has almost certainly rebelled enough to try masturbation.
----------
WTF?!

# BOY JUICES: Are there semen stains on your son's bed sheets or underwear? There's only one way they could have been deposited there. So line up all of your sons at least twice a day for a family prayer meeting and underwear check!
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Wet dreams? *shrug*

# IDEALISM: Does your teenager have liberal or otherwise idealistic political opinions? The weakness of mind brought on by self-abuse often leads to left-wing sympathies.
----------
Rofl.

# FADDISM: Does your child wear fashionable clothing or hairstyles? If your child can't resist the peer pressure to look a certain way, he or she probably can't resist the peer pressure to masturbate, either.
----------
Sense of identity

# EVIDENCE: Have you caught your child masturbating? If you walk into your son's bedroom without knocking and he's in there with his pants down stroking his erect penis, he's probably masturbating.
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What kind of parent would do that?!

[Ergot]

http://www.whitehouse.org/kids/tobacco.asp

http://www.sexisforfags.com/
http://www.ironhymen.com/

hehe.

[Blaze]

http://www.javaop.com/uploads/guest/advice.zip

Fully ripped page /w images.

[Screenor]

http://www.javaop.com/uploads/guest/advice.zip

Fully ripped page /w images.

Why not just upload the directory of the needed images if you're going to do that? Much faster/easier.

[GameSnake]

# ACNE: Does your teenager have acne? Masturbation often leads to excessive hormone production, which is the primary cause of acne. Very few teenagers who don't masturbate have acne.
----------
Eating Greasy food

# DEPRESSION: Is your teenager depressed? If a teenager acts sullen, withdrawn or unhappy – the most likely cause is chronic masturbation.
----------
Doing bad in school

# DESIRE FOR PRIVACY: Does your child lock his or her bedroom door? It is not healthy for a teen to desire privacy. Chances are he or she is in there masturbating.
----------
Wtf?

# "ROCK" MUSIC: Does your child listen to "Rock And Roll" music? If a teenager has rebelled against God far enough to listen to the Devil's music, then he or she has almost certainly rebelled enough to try masturbation.
----------
WTF?!

# BOY JUICES: Are there semen stains on your son's bed sheets or underwear? There's only one way they could have been deposited there. So line up all of your sons at least twice a day for a family prayer meeting and underwear check!
----------
Wet dreams? *shrug*

# IDEALISM: Does your teenager have liberal or otherwise idealistic political opinions? The weakness of mind brought on by self-abuse often leads to left-wing sympathies.
----------
Rofl.

# FADDISM: Does your child wear fashionable clothing or hairstyles? If your child can't resist the peer pressure to look a certain way, he or she probably can't resist the peer pressure to masturbate, either.
----------
Sense of identity

# EVIDENCE: Have you caught your child masturbating? If you walk into your son's bedroom without knocking and he's in there with his pants down stroking his erect penis, he's probably masturbating.
----------
What kind of parent would do that?!

Isn't it odd that it's usually the priests who preach this shit (and they really do!) are the ones butt fucking boys?
Theres God for ya; don't masterbaite but get butt raped by an old man!

[Sidoh]

Did someone actually believe that was real? o_O

[Blaze]

I just had some time to kill. :)

[Vex3]

Revised Blaze edition:

# ACNE: Does your teenager have acne? Masturbation often leads to excessive hormone production, which is the primary cause of acne. Very few teenagers who don't masturbate have acne.
----------
Hmm well let's think: Acne is caused from sweat, so if your kid plays sports he must also masterbate.

# DEPRESSION: Is your teenager depressed? If a teenager acts sullen, withdrawn or unhappy – the most likely cause is chronic masturbation.
----------
Maybe I wouldn't be so depressed if you know mom and dad wern't checking my underware after prayer time.

# DESIRE FOR PRIVACY: Does your child lock his or her bedroom door? It is not healthy for a teen to desire privacy. Chances are he or she is in there masturbating.
----------
I lock my bedroom door when I am on the phone for business calls. Must mean I masterbate while I talk to every client.

# "ROCK" MUSIC: Does your child listen to "Rock And Roll" music? If a teenager has rebelled against God far enough to listen to the Devil's music, then he or she has almost certainly rebelled enough to try masturbation.
----------
Rock Music of course is the devil because it is enjoyable to listen to. And by this article we can tell that anything enjoyable has to be the devil.

# BOY JUICES: Are there semen stains on your son's bed sheets or underwear? There's only one way they could have been deposited there. So line up all of your sons at least twice a day for a family prayer meeting and underwear check!
----------
It's not my fault the neighbours daughter sexually assaults me.

# IDEALISM: Does your teenager have liberal or otherwise idealistic political opinions? The weakness of mind brought on by self-abuse often leads to left-wing sympathies.
----------
Wouldn't want the child to have a political opinion, you know that would cause bush some serious trouble if a 13-19 year old teen stuck up too him. Wait a minute doesn't bush have political opinions? Must mean he masterbated when he was a teen. Bush is now the devil.

# FADDISM: Does your child wear fashionable clothing or hairstyles? If your child can't resist the peer pressure to look a certain way, he or she probably can't resist the peer pressure to masturbate, either.
----------
I don't know about you but when I meet up with my friends we don't all say let's run into the woods and masterbate. Hell, I never knew it was a crime to look good. Wait, don't President Bush and Vice President Dick Chaney both were custom made $600 suits. I guess you get a custom made suit to look bad in then.

# EVIDENCE: Have you caught your child masturbating? If you walk into your son's bedroom without knocking and he's in there with his pants down stroking his erect penis, he's probably masturbating.
----------
First of all maybe I had an itch and a good stroke got it away. Maybe President Bush has never herd of Hormones. A teenager can get an errect penis at any time. But honestly wtf what would you say? "Hey Johnny, stop masterbating! President Bush says its bad. Ok, now lets go to church and let the Father do your bumhole and take away your sins.