Paradoxes and Oxymorons

[Joe]

I always find these interesting. Paradoxes can give any intelligent person a headache, and oxymorons can make you chuckle for a minute or so.

Everyone's unique.
Jumbo shrimp.
Microsoft works.

Nine out of ten agree that one out of ten will disagree with the other nine.
I went back in time and killed my great grandfather.

[Sidoh]

Since unique isn't a very descriptive word, the first isn't much of an oxymoron.  "Jumbo" is a relative term, so the second isn't either.  The third is just stupid.

[iago]

Unique implies that people are different.  But the fact that everybody shares the property of being unique can be oxymoronical. 

Microsoft Works is my favorite. :)

[chuck]

http://oxymoronlist.com/

Look whats #1! :)

[Sidoh]

Unique implies that people are different.  But the fact that everybody shares the property of being unique can be oxymoronical. 

Microsoft Works is my favorite. :)

Like I said, "unique" is a very non-descriptive word.  If you were to compile a list of properties of each person, I have little doubt that there would be no two lists that were identical, assuming the number of properties was large enough.  I don't think that's a very good oxymoron.  It's too much of an oversight.

[iago]

Unique implies that people are different.  But the fact that everybody shares the property of being unique can be oxymoronical. 

Microsoft Works is my favorite. :)

Like I said, "unique" is a very non-descriptive word.  If you were to compile a list of properties of each person, I have little doubt that there would be no two lists that were identical, assuming the number of properties was large enough.  I don't think that's a very good oxymoron.  It's too much of an oversight.

You're thinking too hard for a joke :P

[Sidoh]

Oxymorons aren't supposed to be jokes...

[iago]

I'm pretty sure there's supposed to be some humour element in them. 

[Sidoh]

I don't think an oxymoron is supposed to imply anything other than two contradictory phrases.

[rabbit]

I am lying.
This sentence is false.

[Chavo]

"This sentence is false" doesn't work unless you include a statement such that only true and false are possibilities.

Such as:
The sentence below is true.
The sentence above is false.

[Blaze]

I don't think an oxymoron is supposed to imply anything other than two contradictory phrases.

Stop thinking then.  :)

[rabbit]

"This sentence is false" doesn't work unless you include a statement such that only true and false are possibilities.

Such as:
The sentence below is true.
The sentence above is false.

It works just fine:
"This sentence is false."
If it's false, then it is true, which means it's not false, and thusly it's false, so it's true, etc...

[Chavo]

You're making the assumption that completely true and completely false are the only possibilities but your statement makes no restriction such that the assumption is necessary.  My example restricts all possibilities to completely true or completely false.

"This sentence is false"  can be partially true and partially false and still work ;)

[Ender]

Yeah, the unique example sucks. Uniqueness is not unique. By your definition of unique no human is unique because we all share human traits. Unique doesn't mean your completely different.

The "Microsoft Works" one was funny the first time I've heard it but it's so overused now...

The rest are too bad to merit discussion.